Monday, December 10, 2012

Even My Dog is in Therapy

I spent the better part of yesterday morning in therapy for my dog. For those keeping score, there are now 2 out of the 3 NJhousehold members currently in therapy for anxiety.

We are helping Orion work through some stranger anxiety and his issues walking. NJhusband is slightly more successful at taking him for a walk than I am. The last time I tried, Orion broke my finger. The trainer gave us some great tips and a LOT of homework and I think it will really help him.

I wish my own anxiety was getting better. I switched therapists a few months ago in hopes that it would help, but so far I haven't seen much improvement and it is discouraging. I find it difficult to be anywhere but in my house. I am able to go places alone, but if anyone else is with me, even NJhusband or my BFF I tend to panic. My panic mostly causes me to shake and get extremely nauseous, which escalates my panic because I have severe Emetophobia. I am completely terrified of vom, so much so that I haven't even done it since I was 10! That is some impressive mind over matter if you ask me!

NJhusband is amazingly supportive, but it takes its toll on him for sure. Imagine never being able to take your wife out to eat. Knowing that your presence with her in the grocery store causes her to feel ill. Having to constantly explain to your friends why your wife never goes out. I don't hide my anxiety or ask him to, but even if you try to explain it, people will never truly understand unless they have dealt with it themselves  I know his friends think he deserves better and I agree, but I feel powerless to change it.

I know I just need to keep with the program the new therapist is implementing. It is a completely different therapy than my previous and I feel myself connecting with her techniques more. Yet another lesson in patience for my impatient self.

I wonder if Orion gets annoyed at his anxiety. Maybe I should take up barking....


6 comments:

  1. I know I don't know you, but I've read your blog since before it was newlywed tales so I sort of feel like I do :). Do you read The Bloggess? I feel like you could identify with some of her struggles and that her responses might even make you laugh. It doesn't necessarily improve your current situation, but might help you feel a little better. Also, good for you for being able to go out to the grocery store (if only when you're alone) and/or any of the number of other places you're able to go alone. I have an extreme fear of driving, but it sounds like you're able to tackle that too. I think you should give yourself more credit for what you CAN do!

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    1. Awww thanks! My therapist tells me EXACTLY the same thing, that I need to focus on what I do accomplish and not compare myself to others.

      I will definitely check out The Bloggess! Thanks for the recommendation.

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  2. I'm also going to chime in with the commenter above. :) I don't know you in real life either but I DO know that you are an incredibly kind soul who reached out to me when I was in a time of difficulty and I want you to know that I am here for the same! You (and Orion) are making strides just by being in therapy. I have an enormous fear of driving, to the point where I find it hard to drive anywhere outside of a 2 mile radius of my house. Your achievements are an inspiration to me!

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    1. You are too sweet! Your blog is one of my FAVS! I'm STILL waiting for Horatio by the way! lol

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  3. So sorry to hear you're going through a rough time with your anxiety. Anxiety is a constant with me, too. It's so great to have a supportive spouse, but I completely understand the feeling of just wanting to feel normal. Kudos to you for doing what you need to do to find the right therapy. Stick with it and believe it will get better. This, too, shall pass. xxoo

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    1. "It won't always be like this" needs to be tattooed on me somewhere! LOL What is normal anyway??

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